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I have a website as a singer, with some photos, audio clips, a resume and a domain email address on it. This email came to that address today:
could you please please send me a photo of you. you are absolutely wonderful and i love all i have heard and all i have read about you. much more success to you and thank you very very much. you are so beautiful.followed by his name and an address.
Now, I don't want to be rude to a fan, but this seriously creeps me out. It borders on the stalkery. I have very seldom been asked for my photograph from complete strangers as if I was a Hollywood star or something, but I don't know whether that was because I was just not well known enough yet, or that I'm an opera singer (which does not result in quite the same level of celebrity, except for a scant handful of singers).
And yet, Laura Claycomb (who is moderately famous in the opera world and has a few recordings under her belt) talks about having to stock small photos to sign and mail when she goes to Europe or sings at major houses, so I didn't want to dismiss the guy out of hand. But something rang false to me here. He doesn't mention anything specific about me or where he has seen, heard, or read about me. It could almost be a form letter.
I got a request like this once before, from a different fellow, who had some photos of my voice teacher and wanted an autograph from her (and who emailed me the photos) but she was much more of a name than I am. She, to her credit, was creeped out by the guy and wouldn't respond.
Well, I did a search for this new guy's name, email, and address and found the following in various guestbook pages.
On the guestbook for a young semi-unknown actress on a UPN show:
dear _______, you are so beautiful. you are going to fly ,no matter what you do. could you please please send me a photo of you. please. i can't wait to see what all you do in the future. much success to you and i love you very much.
On the guestbook for a female comedian:
_______=funny and oh so beautiful.
On the guestbook for a race car driver:
dear _______-could you please please send me a photo of you. please. you are absolutely amazing. thank you so very much.
On the blog of a Vegas cocktail waitress:
could you please please please send me a photo of you. without any exceptions,you are the most beautiful woman in the world. everything you ever do is going to turn gold. you are absolutely wonderful. many blessings and thank you very much.
To which she comments: "Anyone want to take up a collection for this poor guy?"
Yeah. I think this possibly may not be a genuine fan.
What do you folks think about photo-grubbing from random people? At what level of fame does it become appropriate, if ever?
_________
His postal address is on all of the photo requests, and also on a personal ad of his I found in the same search. It seems a bit dangerous for him to let so many strangers on the Internet know where he lives. I wonder how many responses he gets to these approaches.
Anonymous
November 28 2005, 23:07:39 UTC 6 years ago
How old do you think he is? Perhaps a teenager?
November 28 2005, 23:09:22 UTC 6 years ago
November 29 2005, 00:23:25 UTC 6 years ago
...well, now that I have a copy of the CD "Little Women" :)
6 years ago
6 years ago
November 28 2005, 23:08:54 UTC 6 years ago
Sorry
I apologize, the above comment is mine. No need to creep you out with an anonymous comment when this is already happening. Something is weird about the Mac I am using as it did not let me log in at first.November 28 2005, 23:09:58 UTC 6 years ago
Re: Sorry
His personal ad, to answer your question, said he was 47. The photo said much the same.November 29 2005, 00:28:13 UTC 6 years ago
Re: Sorry
Does the photo look creepy? Scary? Normal?6 years ago
6 years ago
November 28 2005, 23:16:07 UTC 6 years ago
Unfortunately, there are so many really creepy people out there that the minor ones still set of the freak detector.
November 28 2005, 23:23:55 UTC 6 years ago
BTW, I've gotten really similar emails and I'm nowhere near your career level. There seem to be a lot of people out there papering their walls with 8x10 glossies.
November 28 2005, 23:28:21 UTC 6 years ago
um, right, your question!
You didn't ask what you should DO, you asked what we THOUGHT. Right.I simply don't understand it. I don't have a problem with people wanting my photo, I just don't have any idea what they DO with them. What would I do with a photo of a famous singer? I've got nothing.
November 29 2005, 04:10:19 UTC 6 years ago
Re: um, right, your question!
Well, I have an autographed (not to me; I bought it at the Met gift shop) of Anna Russell hanging over my keyboard as an inspiring reminder not to take myself too seriously in this business. But apart from that, I think some people like to collect headshots because it lets them have a little piece of famous people for themselves. A little personal cache of fame that they can touch.But non-famous people? Maybe he hits folks up for photos who are at the beginning of their careers and flattered by the attention, then when we get super-famous they'll be worth lots of money. Or something.
Or maybe he just jerks off to them. Either way it doesn't make me want to send him any.
November 28 2005, 23:32:56 UTC 6 years ago
I'm hardly famous enough to warrant the request as it is, let alone from someone who seemingly doesn't know my work at all.
6 years ago
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November 28 2005, 23:39:19 UTC 6 years ago
Also, not stalking you, but I got to listen to the audio clips today, and they are truly gorgeous.
November 29 2005, 04:17:25 UTC 6 years ago
Glad you liked 'em. :)
November 29 2005, 06:11:29 UTC 6 years ago
You know, the one with the water-spout.
Of course, since the child is being Raised By Geeks, she believes that the second verse to the Bitsy Fider Thong is the 80s Spider-Man theme....
November 29 2005, 00:52:34 UTC 6 years ago
I guess if your photos start appearing in the front pages of national papers, Time/Life magazines, or the tabloids, then you should expect total strangers to ask for your autographed photos.
I thought of a rather mean solution: send him a copy of "Ain't no way back."
But, on second thought, him drooling over you as a teenager is even creepier...
November 29 2005, 01:51:08 UTC 6 years ago
November 29 2005, 04:15:22 UTC 6 years ago
As for the new fandom/obsession every week, I have no earthly idea how some random person in Pennsylvania would suddenly found out about me. I'm certainly not that famous. And he didn't write to me as if he was a fan (no specifics about where he's heard me sing, how he found out about me); he wrote the same exact thing he wrote to everyone else. He's farming for free headshots.
November 29 2005, 04:12:26 UTC 6 years ago
I get weird letters from, believe it or not, FROG FANS at my stupid frogland site all the time, and they are a touch scarier because, I mean, we're talking about FROG FANS afterall! One guy painted me a giant picture of a red eyed tree frog, AND he included a whole set of pewter frog warriors (think DND only extra dorky) that he had hand painted, AND he included a hand written 3 page letter about how awesome the site is and how cool I am (I kid you not...even Floyd was a touch freaked at this part!). Dude, I get stuff like this from kids all the time, BUT THIS GUY WAS 26. Aieyaiyai.
Nevermind that at the time, the only photos of myself on the site were this one and this one. Yike.
And that is why I have a PO Box for anything to do with that site!
November 29 2005, 05:05:09 UTC 6 years ago
November 29 2005, 04:34:05 UTC 6 years ago
website
Do you have any clips of songs you have done. What kinda of gigs have/are you doing?? I would like to audition for Palm Springs Opera but, i'd like somewhere closer perhaps. Could you offer any advice as to where I should start?? Thanks!!Mandi
November 29 2005, 05:00:42 UTC 6 years ago
Re: website
I highly recommend Laura Claycomb's excellent Guide for Young Singers, one of the pages of which I linked to in this post. That should give you a very good start.As for the audio clips, I like to keep myself semi-anonymous on this blog (semi, because many people who read it have met me in person, but I don't want to broadcast who I am to Teh Intarweb), so I won't link directly to them, but skeetermonkey can tell you where my site is.
November 29 2005, 05:24:06 UTC 6 years ago
Re: website
Just so you know, I, a non-creepy random guy, have been able to discover your identity, with a modest amount of sleuthing, based on the last few entries, today's comments, and your User Info. So, the level of anonymity could be higher, if such is desired.6 years ago
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November 29 2005, 19:12:12 UTC 6 years ago
I'd still not encourage him, lest he develop into an obsessive type.
I don't understand the urge (and I've gotten a few, random, people doing similar things). From my POV the hate mail is easier to cope with.
TK
December 1 2005, 18:23:13 UTC 6 years ago
Anonymous
December 12 2005, 20:01:11 UTC 6 years ago
I...um....ok.
Hey, I dont know if I have an opinion about the "stalker", but.....you ROCK as Bella. and yes, that's definitely a lead role. I'm going to see you twice. Took my boyfriend on Saturday afternoon, and am going with my mother again. YAY!!!
but I'm not going to ask for your picture.....a recording would be worthwhile.
From: she who was once "divalibby76"